I have not done the greatest job blogging during this pregnancy, or at least blogging about this pregnancy. It makes me a little sad to think that some of the feelings have been forgotten already but honestly, pregnancy and parenting a toddler do not leave a lot of time for thoughts beyond surviving the day.
I enjoyed most of my pregnancy with Levi, those 9 days post due-date were the worst and the initial sickies were not pleasant but other than that the swelling belly and constant rolls and kicks were enjoyable.
This time, I have not felt the same. The sickness and exhaustion were overwhelming for so much longer this time around and all of a sudden here we are at 34 weeks; the swollen feet and hands, the uncomfortable giant belly, the constant movement and the not fitting in any of my clothes are so not anything poetic to write about.
I understand that without the belly and the discomfort etc. etc. there would be no baby girl and I am thankful to be experiencing it (even if it doesn't sound that way, I truly am). However, this time the symptoms have just meant that my activity level with Levi and even in general have been very limited. I want to be able to run around after Levi, push him in his little car, crawl through his play tunnel and generally throw him around :) Not to mention going up and down stairs to do laundry without being out of breath and without feeling like the bending over to get the clothes from the washer is going to send me into early labor. I'm ready to have my body back (or what's left of it) and also to have some control over my energy levels again (even if that's just in my head because let's face it when newborns want to feed every few hours and your toddler is up at 6am you will be exhausted!) Still, I am ready embrace non-pregnant motherhood once again!
I anticipate these final weeks will pass slowly with the holiday activities over and not much to keep us busy. I am trying to plan playdates and we have wonderful friends to share time with, but I am losing the creativity or energy to do much outside of the house these days. I hope that Levi will have grace with me as I start to parent more and more from the couch. He has just started to climb everywhere at home, he has been honing his stills with our built in bookshelves and he really enjoys climbing onto the chair in our hallway to gain access to some light switches, he is so quick that sometimes I am only alerted to the fact he is up there when teh hallway light starts flashing! This new development has come at a less than ideal time with my ever growing belly making lifting him down (especially when I have to hoist myself up off the couch first::) ) a tiring task - especially because he does it multiple times in a row with seemingly little care for my discouragement.
We have some (kind of big) house projects on our "to do" lists before baby girl too. They involve our two upstairs bathrooms and doing some "simple" updating. We have made some plans, but still need to choose and order tiles and other fittings before the work can begin. With the days ticking away I am starting to feel my nesting instincts and the anticipation of work projects not getting done in time competing with one another for space in my head - they are heading towards and knock down drag out battle and I am ready for something, anything, that indicates the projects might be done before she arrives...if it doesn't happen soon I might find myself chipping off tile or whipping out the paintbrush myself just to satisfy the urge! I think the anticipated arrival of our new dresser/change table this week will ease the nesting somewhat because I will be able to fill drawers and organise clothes and diapers, oh the pink and sparkles :) I even have an art piece to hang on the wall in our room above the dresser and some fabulous paper balls from my baby shower (I have another post about that coming) to hang from the ceiling to give our girl a tiny space of her own.
I am just ready to meet my daughter.