Thursday, May 13, 2010

Mother's Day - A Memory and a Promise

Last weekend was Mother's Day in the U.S. I hadn't thought too much about it, and then suddenly I was waking up on Sunday morning and this wave of emotion rushed over me. If we were still pregnant, this day would have looked so different. It would have been a celebration, our first Mother's Day. Instead, this was just another day. A time to celebrate our own mothers, yes, but also a reminder of what we had lost.

It was an absolutely beautiful day weather-wise and after Jeremy left for worship band practise, I was able to spend time with my fabulous friend Lindsey and walk in the sunshine. That helped lift my mood in the most wonderful way.

I have really felt the Lord's healing over the past few months. I found my heart felt almost conflicted on Mother's day as it held hope and expectancy for the future and also an awareness of loss. I didn't exactly feel sad but I didn't know how to put into words how I was feeling.

When we got back from church, I received and email from a friend, her words touched my heart, meant so much and she put into words beautifully how we feel about our pregnancy. I continue to be touched by friends who share about their own experiences of loss and am amazed by the healing that can be found in this supportive community - near and far.

"Have a great Mothers Day. I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy too, so I know what this day is like with a little child that is only a memory and a promise. You are a mother in every sense of the word. Happy Mother's Day!"

The sadness is truly passing and we are left with just that, "a memory and a promise". We know God is good, and we know and trust he has a plan to give us a future and a hope. We want to have a family, but we choose to thank God for each day he gives us, and try to remember to rejoice and be glad in it - whatever it holds.

1 comment:

  1. "a memory and a promise". that is one of the most beautiful things i've ever read. so many take mother's day for granted, while others grieve in multiple ways. God is good to bring people into our lives who can speak words of truth and comfort! Love you.



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