Friday, June 17, 2011
more thoughts on Micah 6:8
Thoughts on justice continue to flood my mind.
My desire to make the world just is fueled in some way by the fact that I want to move against the feelings of 'life's not fair' that burn deep within me. My life has not turned out the way I planned it. We can't have a baby of our own - or at least that's a very real possibility. It that feels unjust.
I have been pregnant. I have prayed for God to save my babies. And instead I have had miscarriages.
A fellow blogger who is currently pregnant with her second child, had suffered bleeding early in her pregnancy. She feared miscarriage and when I heard this news, I began to pray for her unborn baby. I prayed that God would keep him safe, it was the same prayer I had prayed for my own babies, the words felt all too familiar.
The next day, she blogged "God is good, my baby is fine" and now she is close to delivering her baby son, a little brother for her 3 year old daughter. I see in her life that God is good. It feels so unjust. That she gets two healthy babies and I have none. That God answered my prayers for her baby to be ok, but he took my babies home to Himself before I ever got to meet them. Even as I type these words, tears are streaming down my face. I struggle so hard to find the justice in this part of my life.
Yet the truth is, undeniably, that God is good. All the time. Even if my friend had lost her baby, it would have been no less true that God is good.
In the midst of the fear of our future, and the apparent 'injustice' in our story the weight of the truth of God's goodness sits heavy on my shoulders. I feel the enormity of my sin and I am reminded that I do not deserve any of the blessings I have in my life. My sin, our sin, was put on Jesus as he died on the cross. Justice for me would be death, but in Christ I have new life. I am humbled to live a full life in Christ. And in my earthly days I am humbled to walk with God. I guess that's where the last part of Micah 6 come in.
The abundant life that Christ gave me is a message to be proclaimed. His goodness in making a place for us at his table for eternity is something to be shared. Our earthly lives will not be easy and we will not always understand His ways but in our suffering and in the places where we cry out that "it's not fair" we can know more of who Christ is. He took on the injustice of the world and one day His Kingdom will come and bring His perfect justice. Until then His Kingdom here on earth must be personified by us, those who believe God is our Saviour. We have a chance to show the light of God in places of injustice. It's simple but it is a big responsibility.
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What a beautifully written post. Wishing you all the best with your adoption process. Blessings to you.
ReplyDeleteICLW #9