Trial and Beauty - Real Life

This week it feels as though spring has really arrived in Seattle. It's not been sunshine all the way, in fact Wednesday was quite miserable a times but the sun has definitely been shining and the temperatures have been staying in the mid 60's which is a lovely and welcome change.

J and I had talked about having a date night last night, making the most of it before we need to get a sitter for that luxury, but I never could have imagined that we would be having a picnic. J got home from work and suggested we pick up something to eat and take it to the beach to eat. We got some food and instead of heading to our original planned destination we went somewhere closer because we we not sure the weather would hold out for much longer. However, once we got to the beach park, the clouds had cleared, the wind was non-existent and the sun was warm. We headed down to the sand and put out our blanket and we ate dinner, shared stories about our day, and watched the sun go down while our baby boy kicked away to his hearts content. It was a perfect evening.

There are some moments when I just look at a moment in my life and wonder what I did to be so blessed. Laying at the beach, the warm sun on my face, holding the hand of the man I love, with a swollen belly full of baby, I can't help but feel blessed beyond measure.

Life is not always easy. It is not without trials but even in the tough times there are glimpses of heaven, of God's kingdom here on earth. And tonight was certainly one of those moments.

I can think back to the times in my life when I didn't know how I would make it to my tomorrow. Times when my hope was gone and my hear was so hurt and broken that I couldn't imagine ever being happy. These times are not all in my distant past. Not as if you walk through the bad and get to good and never look back. The trials are woven into life.

I have strong memories of the days when I was crippled with anxiety and unable to leave my house were woven with learning about the power of prayer and the gift of community which led to getting on a plane and starting a new life thousands of miles away.

There were desperate and painful tears as my lonely heart ached for a companion, but in the midst of that time grew deep and blessed friendships, and sweet times with my God, my first love. Until the man that God had in mind all along came into my life, and loved me completely.

There were painful days and nights as my body expelled pregnancy after pregnancy and my heart broke over and over as my hope of being a mother faded, but in the midst there we treasured times of intimacy in our marriage as we shared a grief only we could fully understand. And then the moment happened when we saw our baby's tiny heartbeat flickering on the screen and we knew our lives would never be the same.

And to last night. The beach picnic date. The perfect moment. It will not be the last moment when the goodness of life overwhelms me, but I also know that there will be other trials ahead too. I mean, parenting is going to throw us some curve balls for sure, we are blissfully unaware of all that is ahead, but in Him we can do anything.